Tuesday Talk: Signs You're Self Sabotaging Your Own Happiness.
"Darling the world really isn't against you, the only thing against you is yourself".
How many times have you had an idea of something you wanted to do, but then for whatever reason didn't? If there's one common denominator in why we typically don't go for the things we're truly desiring, it has to do with our own thoughts. Our ego, Our perception of who we are, our stories on what we're capable of, it's all the self sabotage we do internally not everything else in the world. However, in life how many times does it feel better (temporarily) to blame everything / everyone else?
From personal experience, and the clients I work with I have found there is a common trend of reasons why we self sabotage. The irony though is that these are all things we are "taught" as we grow up. Think about it, #kids are so fearless! They don't think half the time, they just DO. If it doesn't work, well who cares they just think of another way to try again. They honestly are quite the humans we could learn a thing or two from.
Common reasons we self sabotage:
Fear. Time. Indecisiveness. Lack of self worth.
Others opinions. Unknown / being uncomfortable.
Fear: THIS DOESN'T EVEN EXIST! It's formed from all our negative thoughts, creating well MORE negative thoughts. Get out of your own head.
Time: We all want the RIGHT time or moment to start something. Bubble burst, that never is a thing. Therefore, if you know you want to do something go do it. Get messy, because waiting will just let you create more fear and stay stagnant.
Indecisiveness: If there's one that really fits me here it is. Honestly though, many of us talk ourselves out of something as we're talking ourselves into it. Kinda screwed up don't you think? We want it to go right, so we change our mind the second it doesn't feel right. (see a pattern of how they're all connecting to one another?)
Lack of self worth: If you're not #confident in who you are, your values, morals, what you stand for, then you will ALWAYS hold yourself back. End of story. Until you "fake it until you make it" because you know you're capable your greatness doesn't show.
Others opinions: People pleasers this is you. Sorry to also burst your bubble, but because of my reference to lack of self worth there's a good chance that's why you're in this category. We don't believe in our own abilities so we seek validation from others. (Side note, this doesn't long term fix your lack of self worth / build confidence). Stop asking for other people's thoughts, or opinions. (Something I have had to work on GREATLY!) It's your life, own it.
Unknown / being uncomfortable: Creatures of habit, like routines. We crave security, safety, knowing how it'll all work out. When something is tough, panic kicks in or well creates fear, has us asking others, demolishes our self worth, has us waiting on time. (I think you've caught on now). Honestly, for the two cents it's worth getting uncomfortable / messy is a beautiful thing. This is where the real growth happens. This is where you start to break the self sabotage habits you've been holding onto.
Truth is, it's time you stop holding yourself back. It's time you show the world your greatness. The beauty in all this though is that regardless of how many of those reasons might be you right now, they are all things you can work on breaking. It all starts in your mind though. It all starts with you making a commitment / promise to yourself to pursue life on your own terms. I know you're capable, but do you? (Remember, other people's opinions don't matter) <3
Not sure where to start, or needing some help? Schedule you're discovery call with me under transformwithtaryn.com/clientapplication . Let's chat about steps to having you elevate your life to the fullest potential.